“I am so beyond frustrated right now…” These are the words I noticed myself think just now. It’s crazy, but even as we continue along a spiritual path, we still feel these things at times. But, I guess *that* is the crux of a spiritual practice, to find ourselves whirling in what seems like chaos at times, but to be able to stop, step back and notice what’s going on.
I’m experiencing technology woes today as fears of potentially losing all my photos and whatnot are mounting as my external hard drive is suddenly no longer accessible…
There is on the one hand this part of me that wants to keep trying to fix it and keep tinkering away checking the same few things over and over again. On the other hand, there’s this part of me that realizes that trying to force it to work is not going to make it work.
That’s the hard part, though. It’s hard to let things be… to let go of control, especially when things are going wrong from our perspective. There’s this tendency to want to fix things, to make them right to make ourselves feel better.
But, in the end that’s what binds us. It’s our need to control our situation because we have placed our happiness, sense of wellbeing and peace in some external factor. When that’s the case, of course we want to control it, because should it continue to falter, so does our wellbeing.
This is stifling to go on living like this, depending on a perfect balance of exterior influences in order to maintain inner peace. We must learn to cultivate the still place within, the place where our peace, joy and wellbeing reside regardless of what’s going on around us. That is what spells true freedom…
Photo by Joanna Lee Osborn
“What if you let go of every bit of control and every urge that you have, right down to the most infinitesimal urge to control anything, anywhere, including anything that may be happening with you at this moment? Imagine that you were able to completely and absolutely give up control on every level. If you were able to give up control absolutely, totally, and completely, then you would be a spiritually free being.”
— Adyashanti, Emptiness Dancing
And, so that’s where I’m at. I’m ready to just let go of this and experience the freedom that lies beyond my dependence on external events for peace and happiness.